Fail.

This is my day of disappointment.  I gained 2.8lbs.  I'm sitting heavy at 227.6lbs.  Disappointment is a euphemism for how I really feel :-(

Great Unexpectations

Hello!  The weather has been putting a damper on my progress and we had a canceled meeting last week.  However, I weighed in this morning and came in at 224.8lbs!  Down one pound since my holiday binge-a-thon.  Hopefully my yoga arms can hurry up and come back.  I've been suffering in the past two yoga sessions but I'll make it.

In other news, I was able to run 3 minutes straight but then took 20 minutes to not feel like I was about to fall apart.  It's going to be a long haul.  Interestingly enough, I think my Dad is moving in with me this weekend.  Not sure exactly when but his company got the contract approved for the Bellefont plant north of Scotsboro.  This should be fun or terrible.  I'm up for the challenge and not being in this house by myself.  Hooray!

Run Run Run

Alright!  First full week of 2011 and its been mediocre at best.  I can't complain though because at this time last year, I was still dealing with Mom's diagnosis for breast cancer and hoping that we could still go on our cruise.  Well, this year she is doing well and I'm sitting in the warmth of my house getting ready for tonight's festivities and the year.  Earlier this afternoon I met with my friend Matt and he is going to help me train for a 5k.  I'm a bit nervous because I know that I started out so strong with the couch to 5k program and then just stopped.  No good reason either for stopping so suddenly.  However, I told him the whole story about my weight loss journey and my desire to really push for reaching my 5k goal.  My ultimate goal is to run a marathon by the time I'm 30 and that is a real distant dream.  He is emphasizing cross training and increasing my regime to working out 6 days a week for short amount of times.  Due to my flat feet, we had to start small and then work our way up.  I'm excited.  Plus, now I have a semi-couch that is going to push me!  Especially since he agreed to run with me in my first race!  Goodness!  What have I done?!

However, the best thing in the world is that he said he was really impressed with how serious I am about my plans.  I guess that I haven't really talked about my journey or my plans out loud that much so it surprised me when I got verbal approval.  I'm encouraged and determined.  Let's get to it!

Why hello, 2011.

Happy New Year!  Last year at this time, I was just getting back to my apartment from a busy Christmas break.  The year 2010 was looking promising:  late winter cruise, summer wedding in Wyoming, fall wedding in Baltimore, and many other exciting impromptu adventures.  The icing on the cake was buying my house.  I look back on 2010 and think that its been an incredible ride.

The difference between 2010 and 2011 is that I had plans last year that stemmed from preplanning in 2009.  This year, I haven't done any planning.  I feel like I'm flying by the seat [seam?] of my pants and I have on yoga pants.  Those pants are not meant to fly.  Am I too late to get my act together and make some goals.  My heart and mind say yes.  No real resolutions or goals for me this year but I do have to admit that it has come to my attention that I need to care less.  Perhaps care less is not the best term to use.  As Sarah pointed out, I need to choose who I care about.  Lately I have been giving out care bear hugs like candy and I need to chill out.  I'm working on it.

Anyway!  I have a weigh in on Thursday!  I flew back up to 223.0lbs three weeks ago before the holiday break.  I'm starting up the couch to 5k program again and focusing on the new points program.  After February, I'm going to stop paying for my failure [hiatus from paid WW] and focus on get my mind in the right place.  I know that I'm the only person standing in the way of my progress.  I have to get my mojo back.  Losing 6lbs is alright.  I want to be great.

I'm A-L-I-V-E!

Ha!  It has been almost a month.  But I will blame that on being busy, Thanksgiving, and pure laziness.  In fact, I have spent the last two days scrubbing the kitchen and living room floors with my hands to remove all traces of holiday grime.  I'm even debating NOT decorating my house for Christmas.  Granted, this only means putting up one metal snowflake but I'm that lazy.  I don't want to do anything holiday like.  I type that while wearing Christmas themed Family Guy pajama pants.  I can't win.  Ha!

Well, the last time I posted, I weighed in at 223.2.  No tears or disappointment was had.  I was actually expecting that number.  The problem was that I had become complacent.  I'm so used to seeing 2 20 something that it has become the norm.  The light came a week later, right after Thanksgiving.  We had made a ton of food, drank a lot of non-water liquids, played games, and pictures were taken.  Let me rephrase that:  pictures were taken of me in unflattering positions.  I'm talking about hunched over, fixing my plate pictures.  Photos with me seated and my shirt, unbeknown to me, is lifted in the back and all my flat tire middle is showing.  The icing on the cake was the family photo.  It was blurry but you could clearly see the Thanksgiving meal protruding from my tummy, over the waist band of my pants.  But I have such a pretty face!  When's it blurred out, there's not left to do but notice the rest of me.  Boy oh boy I am really disappointed but Rome wasn't built in one day, right?  RIGHT?!

So, to avoid a complete meltdown and harness this agitated energy, I decided to replace volleyball with running.  I haven't ran in years.  However, I discovered the couch to 5k program and I'm trying it out.  I made it through the first week and weighed in on Thursday at 220.8lbs.  The ladies were excited that at least someone lost something after Thanksgiving and I could not have felt better.  I know that running will at least start pushing me though my lack of motivation.  We shall see...

Here are two random songs that I have been listening to lately.  I love them both!

Imogen Heap "Hide and Seek"
Adele "Rolling In the Deep"

I'm a fool! Wait. Am I a fool?

Song of the moment "Fool for you" by Cee Lo Green.  Excellent song.  Excellent.  It's one of those songs that goes straight to my heart.  I think I've listened to it about 20 times in the past 24 hours.  Ha!

So!  It has been a while since I have posted last.  Not much has changed in the past two weeks.  I had a dark day last Thursday and its that time of the month so I know that the scale is going to be atrocious this Thursday.  Oh well.  Its all in the journey, right?  Volleyball is going to end next Monday so I have to figure out another exercise regimen to follow.  The next major sport is going to be softball and that isn't until the spring.  Maybe I'll step up my walking routine and see what happens.  

Oh!  I did go to Baltimore last weekend and it was the most amazing weekend I have had in a while.  I got to hang out with Sarah, drive around the city, eat tons of food, and see family and old friends.  It was an amazing experience.  However, I had to think about if I was missing my old life in Baltimore or missing the life I could have had in Baltimore.  The jury is out but I'll be glad when life leads me back to Maryland.  I miss my friends and family dearly.  Its nice to be around unconditional love.  However, I really love my life at the moment so I can't complain too loudly.  It's not like anyone is listening anyway...

On a different note, I have to talk about this article that was featured on VSB.  The article details the guys perspective of why he thinks certain women have luck dating and others don't.  He even approached it from the point of view of two similar women.  There are five points and my favorite ( favorite = cold bucket of ice thrown in face) is "5. Some women are walking, talking, self-fulfilling (and self-pitying) prophecies".  This point sums up why I will stop complaining about being single all the time.  I have let my single status define me.  It's time to let that go.  Anyway, read the article.  Its amazing!

~Tiff

Okay...cupid?

Ha!  I signed up for Ok Cupid last night.  Not excited.

Today was another weigh in and I didn't do too bad.  I gained 0.8lbs for a grand total of 219.4lbs.  Not too shabby since my attitude went into the crapper this afternoon.  That time of the month is right around the corner. Yeah!